I was once under the impression I had it easier because boys were less maintenance when it came to fashion and such...apparently I was not prepared for Daniel. Daniel is my middle son who claims in all confidence that he is quite good looking and on occasion even 'hot'! Not the word a mom wants to hear in reference to her almost 17 year old son. Handsome-yes. Good looking-yes. Cute-ok. Hot-NOT! (Especially when his 14 year old brother comes home and tells me that all the freshman girls in school think he's sooooo hooooottt!) But there is something to be said for God-confidence - he tells me it's not arrogance for him to know that he is made in God's image and every good and perfect thing comes from Him! He does have a point I can't argue with, LOL! We're working on the humility...
OK, so this fine looking young man was voted Jr. Class Homecoming Court attendant (whatever the title is) so he has to dress up to escort the Jr. Princess. Never to be average at anything, Dan decides he wants to wear a bow tie! Not only that but wait for it....she is wearing a deep plum colored cocktail style dress and he wants a bow tie - here it comes.... in LIME GREEN!!!!
His choice is to wear a shirt that matches her dress (which I've only seen on the website - "actual colors may vary" ) black dress pants, a lime bow tie and lime green suspenders! Yeah, I'm sure the local Sears can hook me right up-with the event this Friday! Being the good Mom I am I go to a local Tuxedo rental shop yesterday and there it is - a lime green bow tie available to rent for $5! But along with it is a vest so I'm thinking I can talk him into wearing black pants, black shirt, vest and tie and at least dial it down a notch on the rainbow but up a notch from 'Mork & Mindy'.
So with tape measure in hand and hope in my heart I drive the 25 miles to school (one way) to tell him so that we can order it today! "Oh, it's only Homecoming. I don't want to do all that business" he says. My balloon has burst so I'm afraid to ask what he wants now. "Well, do you want the tie?" I ask tentatively. "Well yeah!" So I ask him what color shirt he is going to wear and tell him the whole idea of black and that it will look much classier, etc. To which he replies....
"Mom, no offense but I don't think that will look good and I don't want to look like a retard!"
Oh....my bad!
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
Saturday, September 13, 2008
You Know You're Getting Old When...
I had to laugh when my 14 year old son called me tonight to ask me what he could wear to a retro birthday party. I asked him what he meant by retro and he said, "You know, Mom, like old, like the 80s"!
Who would have dreamed that what we wore in high school would be 'awesome' now. Because honestly when I look at pictures of those 'retro' days I have to ask, "What were we thinking?" And I remember when 'retro' meant the 60s!
Who would have dreamed that what we wore in high school would be 'awesome' now. Because honestly when I look at pictures of those 'retro' days I have to ask, "What were we thinking?" And I remember when 'retro' meant the 60s!
Thursday, September 11, 2008
The Customer is Always...?
I don't even believe what just happened to me. After several months of leaving my son's band uniform at the cleaners I was down to the wire - he needs it tomorrow night. Back up to last week, I went to pick up the uniform and was told there was not a uniform for 'Fuller'. They only had one band uniform there and yes, it was a Dexter uniform but it had a different name - 'Anthony Campos'. So obviously there was a mix-up and Anthony had picked up Nathan's. But nothing is obvious in my life or simple either. I was told I could not pick up the uniform because I was not the one who dropped it off but to check with the band director to see if Anthony had turned one in. Forget that my son's uniform was missing and that this was the only Dexter uniform they had. Oh, that's right, I forgot, MOMS know NOTHING!
Sure enough, when I checked with Ms. Schmidt Anthony had indeed turned in a uniform already and can you believe the #'s in his uniform did not match the one he checked out? So today, naturally the day before he has to have it, I go to pick it up-at 5:30-right before closing-already on the mental edge. Little did I know...
ME: I need to pick up a band uniform for Anthony Campos, please.
CLERK: (get the uniform-again the only one there) That will be $9.65
ME: Counting out the correct change - all the cash I have left mind you.
CLERK: Taking the cash, removing the tag, pausing..."Does this uniform belong to you?"
(I must not look like the mother of Anthony Campos...but since when do the cleaners ask if what you're picking up belongs to you?)
ME: Blah, blah, blah...I go on to explain the whole story
CLERK: Well, I can't release this uniform to you. Anthony is going to have to come pick it up himself.
ME: Why should Anthony's parents have to pick up or pay for another uniform?
CLERK: Because they dropped this one off.
ME: Maybe they did, but they were given the wrong one when they picked one up, and now I don't have one for my son and he needs it tomorrow.
CLERK: We are very careful and don't make mistakes like that.
ME: Ok, whatever. The band director told me she could speak to someone if there were any questions. I can call her.
CLERK: As long as she can authorize the release of the uniform. But I will have to have my manager approve it also when he comes in tomorrow morning and then you can pick it up anytime after 7.
ME: So I will have to make another trip back here to pick it up? (We live in the country outside of town.)
CLERK: I cannot release this to you.
ME: So I'm stuck having to clean up the mess for someone else's mistake?
CLERK: WE didn't make the mistake and I can't...
ME: I know, I know; you can't release it to me! (I go to my van and look up the phone # for the band director, meanwhile she is calling her manager. I explain what is happening to Ms. Schmidt who is laughing-me, not so much at this point. I go back in and tell her I have the band director on the phone and ask her to speak with her.
CLERK: (This is the biter!) I'm not going to talk to her. How do I know who you have on the other end of that phone?!
ME: You have got to be kidding me, right? You just told me the band director could speak to someone and authorize you to release the uniform. And now I'm a liar! I don't want the uniform because it's mine - it belongs to the school anyway!
CLERK: Well, she can call the manager at 7am! (She thrusts the store phone at me.) Here, my manager want to talk to you!
Fortunately for the manager, he had a very different tone and was very kind. He tried to explain her behavior as 'protecting herself' and that there are people who pick up other people's laundry without permission - please, somebody wants somebody else's band uniform? I know they make a great fashion statement but really! Good news is he told me to take the uniform and leave a phone number where he could reach me if he needed to. Now tell me please, WHY could we not have done that from the beginning?
Somebody please, call the Fashion Police!
Sure enough, when I checked with Ms. Schmidt Anthony had indeed turned in a uniform already and can you believe the #'s in his uniform did not match the one he checked out? So today, naturally the day before he has to have it, I go to pick it up-at 5:30-right before closing-already on the mental edge. Little did I know...
ME: I need to pick up a band uniform for Anthony Campos, please.
CLERK: (get the uniform-again the only one there) That will be $9.65
ME: Counting out the correct change - all the cash I have left mind you.
CLERK: Taking the cash, removing the tag, pausing..."Does this uniform belong to you?"
(I must not look like the mother of Anthony Campos...but since when do the cleaners ask if what you're picking up belongs to you?)
ME: Blah, blah, blah...I go on to explain the whole story
CLERK: Well, I can't release this uniform to you. Anthony is going to have to come pick it up himself.
ME: Why should Anthony's parents have to pick up or pay for another uniform?
CLERK: Because they dropped this one off.
ME: Maybe they did, but they were given the wrong one when they picked one up, and now I don't have one for my son and he needs it tomorrow.
CLERK: We are very careful and don't make mistakes like that.
ME: Ok, whatever. The band director told me she could speak to someone if there were any questions. I can call her.
CLERK: As long as she can authorize the release of the uniform. But I will have to have my manager approve it also when he comes in tomorrow morning and then you can pick it up anytime after 7.
ME: So I will have to make another trip back here to pick it up? (We live in the country outside of town.)
CLERK: I cannot release this to you.
ME: So I'm stuck having to clean up the mess for someone else's mistake?
CLERK: WE didn't make the mistake and I can't...
ME: I know, I know; you can't release it to me! (I go to my van and look up the phone # for the band director, meanwhile she is calling her manager. I explain what is happening to Ms. Schmidt who is laughing-me, not so much at this point. I go back in and tell her I have the band director on the phone and ask her to speak with her.
CLERK: (This is the biter!) I'm not going to talk to her. How do I know who you have on the other end of that phone?!
ME: You have got to be kidding me, right? You just told me the band director could speak to someone and authorize you to release the uniform. And now I'm a liar! I don't want the uniform because it's mine - it belongs to the school anyway!
CLERK: Well, she can call the manager at 7am! (She thrusts the store phone at me.) Here, my manager want to talk to you!
Fortunately for the manager, he had a very different tone and was very kind. He tried to explain her behavior as 'protecting herself' and that there are people who pick up other people's laundry without permission - please, somebody wants somebody else's band uniform? I know they make a great fashion statement but really! Good news is he told me to take the uniform and leave a phone number where he could reach me if he needed to. Now tell me please, WHY could we not have done that from the beginning?
Somebody please, call the Fashion Police!
Saturday, September 6, 2008
No Way! No How!
I don't know what it is about husbands, or maybe it's just men in general, that when you have to be somewhere they are never mindful about being there on time but when it's somewhere they have to be, want to be, or think they should be then the blinders are on and nothing or no one will keep them from their appointed destination at their appointed time. And I mean nothing!
When the boys play football out of town my husband insists on leaving early enough to arrive for a good seat and in time to watch them warm up. Not come out on the field prior to the game, but the actual team warm up that happens at least one hour prior to kick-off! We don't miss a stretch, pass, snap, chant, grunt, or punt. Which is fine as long as we can take care of other business before arriving. By other business I am referring to the female's need to relieve herself after a long drive in someplace other than a public facility that requires the balance and hover maneuver. Can you say, "EEWWWWW!!"
We arrived in Cloudcroft for the 7PM game at 5:55. Headed toward the field we passed a convenience store and I said we probably should stop somewhere before we get to the field because I need to use the restroom. His response, "Oh, there will be restrooms there, that was the next project they were supposed to complete." Something about that statement did not evoke one bit of reassurance that I would be able to quickly and hygienically take care of business. "There will be restrooms there?" Because there weren't any before?
We of course, quickly gathered our things, purchased our tickets and walked toward the stands to make sure to secure our seats. I am looking around carefully while calculating how long I can physically hold out if I have to when I see them. There they are - restrooms! Complete in the Cloudcroft Bear colors of Green and White, the nightmare all women fear - the bathrooms that with any sudden shift in weight distribution could leave you in a horizontal position or worse yet, exposed in front of any and all passers-by. "I'll go with you and stand in front of the door," he tries to sound both apologetic and hopeful. I'm sure the glare answered any and all questions for the rest of the evening as it seemed to reflect off each and every helmet on the field before it radiated directly back to him. So, we continued walking to our seats -
IN THE EMPTY STANDS! (but it was a great warm-up!)
When the boys play football out of town my husband insists on leaving early enough to arrive for a good seat and in time to watch them warm up. Not come out on the field prior to the game, but the actual team warm up that happens at least one hour prior to kick-off! We don't miss a stretch, pass, snap, chant, grunt, or punt. Which is fine as long as we can take care of other business before arriving. By other business I am referring to the female's need to relieve herself after a long drive in someplace other than a public facility that requires the balance and hover maneuver. Can you say, "EEWWWWW!!"
We arrived in Cloudcroft for the 7PM game at 5:55. Headed toward the field we passed a convenience store and I said we probably should stop somewhere before we get to the field because I need to use the restroom. His response, "Oh, there will be restrooms there, that was the next project they were supposed to complete." Something about that statement did not evoke one bit of reassurance that I would be able to quickly and hygienically take care of business. "There will be restrooms there?" Because there weren't any before?
We of course, quickly gathered our things, purchased our tickets and walked toward the stands to make sure to secure our seats. I am looking around carefully while calculating how long I can physically hold out if I have to when I see them. There they are - restrooms! Complete in the Cloudcroft Bear colors of Green and White, the nightmare all women fear - the bathrooms that with any sudden shift in weight distribution could leave you in a horizontal position or worse yet, exposed in front of any and all passers-by. "I'll go with you and stand in front of the door," he tries to sound both apologetic and hopeful. I'm sure the glare answered any and all questions for the rest of the evening as it seemed to reflect off each and every helmet on the field before it radiated directly back to him. So, we continued walking to our seats -
IN THE EMPTY STANDS! (but it was a great warm-up!)
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